(1310-06-18) Haunted...
Summary: Áedhwyn has a haunting dream after the Masque that wakes her from slumber again and again.
RL Date: June 17th, 2018
Related: All logs and memoirs relating to the Rose Sauvage Masque

June 17th, 1310 — Áedhwyn's Suite

The dreams come to me more and more. Maybe it is this place? Each night I wake, my body covered in a cold sweat. It's just a dream, no prophesy….at least none that I know. I have gotten better at recognizing the difference between my dreams.

This is just a dream. One that has haunted me since the Showing the night of the Masque. Why did I go? Why did pride keep me there when I should have fled? I was told their ways were different. Told they were more open to things of an intimate nature between man and woman. I didn't expect there to be three. I didn't expect the man to be so cruel.

I don't know what I expected. I didn't expect them to be so….barbaric. They call me the barbarian, my people savage. But what I saw…I couldn't watch it all. I just heard the sounds but it was enough. Why though did my body tremble as I watched him stalk the girl? Why did my heart beat faster? Why did the sounds the they made towards the end boil my blood yet the sounds of the lash chill me. Perhaps it was that I was in his arms. Perhaps it's that I had them both around me, sheltering me. They couldn't stop all the sounds but their hands were soothing, comforting.

Warm, so very warm, the feel of them around me. My eyes close, my heart settles. I remember the warmth of them, the feel of their hands soothing, calming. I hear the words of the priest. They are not barbarians any more than I am. They are me and I am them. They are more open yet are they truly? Surely these things exist at home. I have heard sounds from the back of the caves, so similar without the punctuation of the lash. What they were doing? What caused those sounds they made? I do not know but one day….one day I will find out for myself. One day I will have the courage to see.

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